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People that take dietary supplements know and understand that it is virtually impossible to obtain the amounts of nutrients needed for optimal health from food alone. They know that the most needed dietary supplement to take is a multivitamin so that their body can receive a variety of much needed vitamins and minerals. What they don't know is the differences between multivitamins and which ones have the highest potency, balances of nutrients, and the best absorption. Many cheap, low quality grocery-store brands (and many brands available through supplement stores) fail at obtaining high quality ingredients for absorption and potency. With most of these brands, there is a high probability that the vitamin simply passes through your system undigested, or with a low percentage of the nutrients absorbed. First let's get one thing straight: If you are taking supplements in pill form, then you definitely have not found the most beneficial supplement on the market. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against pill form supplements, it's just that I know that your body will not get all of the nutrients contained in that supplement. Even If you were to buy the highest quality vitamin on the market, the fact remains that your body has to break down that pill to liquid form before it can be digested properly. When your body breaks the pill down, the pill loses its potency and if the pill is of low quality, your body might not break it down at all (in other words the pill goes right through your system without being digested). Even If your body is able to break down the pill you are still only going to receive 10%-20% of the nutrients. That means for every $100 you are spending on nutrients, you are literally flushing about 90% of it down the toilet. Why take your system through the extra step of breaking down a pill when you can purchase a vitamin that is already in liquid form that will bypass the digestive process and go directly into the bloodstream and into the cells within a matter of minutes? I have tried several dietary supplements in liquid form and the Himalayan Goji Juice endorsed by Dr. Earl Mendell is the only all natural liquid vitamin that I can drink without having to chew some gum to get the nasty taste out of my mouth. This Goji Juice has a delicious taste and comes from goji berries with the highest nutrient density. Himalayan Goji Juice is the only liquid supplement on earth that contains all the nutrients you need to increase your energy and strength naturally while treating high blood pressure, cancer, diabetes, heart disease kidney disease, and a long list of other health problems. This juice contains four active polysaccharides (phytonutrient compounds) unique to the goji berry that come together to control many of of the body's most important biochemical defense systems, and are of great importance to the smooth functioning of every cell in your entire body. The juice also contains 19 amino acids (including all of the essential ones); More protein than whole wheat; 21 trace minerals including germanium (an anti-cancer trace mineral rarely found in foods); Vitamin C at higher levels than even those found oranges; Vitamin E (rarely found in fruits, only in grains and seeds); B-complex vitamins, necessary for converting food into energy; Essential fatty acids (EFA's), which are required for the body's production of hormones and for the smooth functioning of the brain and nervous system; Beta-Sitosterol, an anti-inflammatory agent (Beta-Sitosterol also lowers cholesterol and has been used to treat sexual impotence and prostate enlargement); and a complete spectrum of antioxidant carotenoids, including beta-carotene (a better source then even carrots) and zeaxanthin (protects the eyes). Goji berries are the richest source of carotenoids of all known foods. If you are looking for an all natural easily absorbable nutrient-dense supplement, then you should do yourself a favor and look into Himalayan Goji Juice. vig rx ingredient best penile enlargement penis elargement excersizes vimax penis enlargement excersizes penis enhancement pic penis girth enlargement enhancement forum free matter penis size penis enlagement surgeries

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Lose weight. Reduce stress. Lower your cholesterol level. Improve your circulation. Live longer. Stay younger. Sounds like an ad for a new wonder drug right? In fact it’s a partial list of the benefits of humanity’s oldest and most pleasurable pastime - sex. Most of us are aware of the feel-good benefits of sex while we’re engaged in it, but do you also know that there are benefits which carry on after the sweaty bodies have dried and the sweet talk has reverted to sports? For instance: Maintaining Ideal Body Weight There are 3500 calories in a pound of fat. For every 3500 calories you burn (that you do not replace with food!) you will lose one pound of fat. Sexual intercourse burns approximately 150 calories per half hour. Here’s how that stacks up against some other activities that may be part of your fitness regime: yoga 114 calories per half hour, dancing - rock 129, walking - 3mph 153, weight training 153, canoeing - 2mph 153, volleyball 174. According to one survey reported by the Ottawa Citizen, Canadians on average have sex 7.33 times per month, lasting approximately 24.4 minutes. That means that “Joe Canada” is burning off more than 10 thousand calories a year, or about 3 pounds, in a not particularly active sex life. Those who are more sexually active, into Tantra for instance where lovemaking lasts 4 hours, would burn up 600 calories a session. At once a week that’s 31,200 calories or 9 pounds per year. Considering that people put weight on gradually, slowly gaining 5-10 pounds per year until they are overweight, it’s not unrealistic to assume that regular sexual activity is one way to help maintain a healthy body weight. Increased Blood Flow Sex helps increase the blood flow to your brain and to all other organs of your body. Increased heart rate and deep breathing accounts for the improvement in circulation. As fresh blood supply arrives, your cells, organs and muscles are saturated with fresh oxygen and hormones, and as the used blood is removed, you also remove waste products that cause fatigue and even illness. Lower Cholesterol Lowering your cholesterol is another of the “sex as exercise” benefits. Sex helps lower the overall cholesterol level. Perhaps more importantly it tips the HDL/LDL (good/bad) cholesterol balance towards the healthier HDL side. Stress Reduction, Relaxation and Improved Sleep People having frequent sex often report that they handle stress better, so the normal stresses of living do not become distress. The profound relaxation that typically follows lovemaking, with orgasm for women and ejaculation and/or orgasm for men, may be one of the few times people actually allow themselves to completely let go, surrender and relax. Many indicate that they sleep more deeply and restfully after satisfying lovemaking. In the relaxing afterglow you may be able to let go of distracting thoughts. Being able to stop thinking has helped many to overcome insomnia. Sex as Pain Reliever Through the touch magic of sex the hormone oxytocin is secreted in your body which in turn causes the release of endorphins. Because of these natural opiates sex acts as a powerful analgesic, elevating the pain threshold and helping to relieve the aches of conditions like arthritis, whiplash and headaches. Now there’s a novel approach, sex as a remedy for headache rather than an excuse for abstaining! With arousal and orgasm oxytocin levels rise. They spike 3 to 5 times higher than usual just before orgasm. In fact it is oxytocin that triggers the orgasm. Measurements performed at the Masters and Johnson laboratories have shown that the uterine contractions brought about by orgasm (triggered by oxytocin) are just as powerful as those of child labor. Women can use this extraordinary orgasmic contraction and relaxation of the uterine muscle to relieve cramps during PMS and menstruation. Live Longer, Stay Younger A British study of 1,000 men found those who had at least two orgasms a week had half the death rate of their countrymen who indulge less than once a month. The hormone DHEA promotes sexual excitement and increases in response to it. Dr Theresa Crenshaw author of The Alchemy of Love and Lust says DHEA may be the most powerful chemical in our personal world. It helps balance the immune system, improves cognition, promotes bone growth, and maintains and repairs tissues, keeping your skin healthy and supple. It may also contribute to cardiovascular health and even function as antidepressant. Prostate and Genital Health Some doctors believe that more than 75% of men over 50 have a somewhat enlarged prostate, and that virtually all men will suffer from prostate enlargement if they live long enough. This condition, called benign prostate hypertrophy (BPH), is normal and usually not dangerous. Unfortunately, some of these men develop prostate cancer, one of the leading causes of death in older men. Regular sexual intercourse with frequent ejaculations will help to keep the prostate healthy. For those men who practice delaying ejaculation, for example in the practice of Tantra Sacred Sex, performing Kegel exercises (in which you contract the muscles around your genitals), will tone these muscles, just as exercising other muscles tones other areas of your body. More importantly, these exercises will help keep the prostate healthy, by moving the sexual energy up out of the prostate and circulating it throughout your body. The technique is very simple and you can perform hundreds of contractions per day for top sexual/physical fitness for both men and women. Imagine you are urinating, but want to stop the flow of urine, that’s all there is to it. Contracting your muscles in this way is one of the healthiest exercises you could add to your exercise regime. When 178 Belgian men with minor erection problems participated in a 4-month daily rehabilitation program which primarily focused on Kegel exercises, 74 percent showed improvement and 43 percent were cured. For women, Kegels strengthen the entire urogenital tract, aiding greatly in childbirth and preventing the onset of incontinence in later life. They also sensitize the genital tissues, helping women to become orgasmic and/or increase the intensity of their orgasms Boost Testosterone and Estrogen Regular sexual activity boosts testosterone and estrogen levels in both men and women. Besides boosting your libido testosterone fortifies bones and muscles. Some physicians suggest that testosterone keeps hearts healthy and good cholesterol high. Testosterone is what makes the sex drive in men and women more aggressive. It makes you want to have sex, pursue sex, initiate sex and perhaps dominate the lovemaking. Testosterone seems to motivate both men and women to strongly desire specific genital sex and release by orgasm. Because men have so much testosterone, they seem obsessed with genitals, intercourse and ejaculation, but appear to care less for romance and foreplay-touching, hugging, cuddling, eye gazing, etc. Sex increases women’s estrogen levels keeping vaginal tissues more supple and also protecting against heart disease. It is estrogen that makes a woman sexually receptive and responsive to a man’s approach. It is estrogen that makes her want to be touched and feel romantic, it is testosterone that makes her want to be penetrated. Estrogen makes a woman soft-breasts develop in response to estrogen. Estrogen is a powerful influence on how a woman smells. It influences the degree to which she projects softness, openness, and interest in sexual touching. Men’s bodies also produce estrogen. In fact testosterone can be converted into estrogen in the man’s body. Some estrogen helps a man to develop the softer, more nurturing feminine sides of their personalities. As men age, the testosterone/estrogen balance begins to shift, with testosterone decreasing and estrogen increasing, and this is one reason why so many men seem to mellow out as they get older. The Healing Power of Intimacy Sex is good for you, but sex with love is even better. According to Dr. Dean Ornish author of ‘Love and Survival: the Scientific Basis for the Healing Power of Intimacy’, “an open heart can lead to the most joyful and ecstatic sex”. His researches into intimacy and its effects on health have shown that “anything that promotes feelings of love and intimacy is healing”. If you have someone who really cares for you and for whom you care in return, someone you are intimately connected with in all ways - emotional, physical and more -- then you may be three to five times less likely at risk of premature death and disease from all causes. Part of this has to do with the positive effects of touch, what Dr. Crenshaw refers to as Vitamin T. The chemical composition of your body is changed by touch. Caressing, hugging, stroking, cuddling send a chain reaction of chemicals to signal your brain that this is pleasurable, nurturing, good. There is strong scientific evidence demonstrating the importance of touch to good health. In the 1930s, Dr. Rene Spitz, attending physician at a number of nurseries, noticed that the illness and mortality rates were quite a bit higher in some of the nurseries. His observations and experiments led to the finding that the children who were becoming ill and dying had nothing to do with hygiene or nutrition, but rather had to do with the amount of touching the infants received from the attending staff. He confirmed his findings by hiring “grandmothers” to come into the nurseries to hold, fondle, and cuddle the children. The illness and mortality rates declined rapidly. Researchers at Miami's Touch Research Institute (TRI) found that premature infants who received three massages a day over 10 days gained 47 percent more weight than preemies who weren't massaged. David Sebringsil, who writes regularly for The Society For Human Sexuality (one of the best online sources of excellent, sex-positive information), recommends Erotic Massage become a part of or alternative to regular lovemaking. It is one of the best ways to help someone achieve extended, multiple, or "whole body" orgasmic states. Through erotic massage partners learn to give and receive loving touch and extraordinary pleasure. It makes you healthier and happier. Healthy blood, healthy bones, healthy heart, healthy body and a peaceful mind - all thanks to the healing powers of sex. Next time you’re in the mood let her know you’ve got the doctor on your side! pnis enlargement surgery photo top rated pennis enlargement pills online vig rx pennis enlargement operation penis enlargment excersizes cheap pnis enlargement free penis enlargement tip home pnis enlargement vimax natural penis enlargement pills

Vasectomy is a process through which birth can be controlled. Vasectomy is basically a method which is meant for the male generation. Vasectomy is in fact, a minor form of operation but it needs the doctor’s advice for whoever wants o undergo the operation. Vasectomy is a form of male process of sterilization. Through Vasectomy, the vas deferens of the males is removed through a simple form of surgery. Vasectomy however does not engross the total removal of the male testicles. Moreover Vasectomy also does not any how affect the sex hormones production in the males and neither the secretion of the hormones to the bloodstream is affected. Sexual life is not in any way found to get affected by Vasectomy. Normal erection of the penis and normal ejaculation is experienced by the males even after the Vasectomy. So there is not any sexual risk factor involved in respect of Vasectomy. A male experiences the normal sexual desire even after Vasectomy. After the Vasectomy is performed, the male sperm no longer finds its outlet to the penis as they get already broken down and gets absorbed in different parts of the body. Vasectomy takes only a very short span of time to be performed. After it is operation is over, the operated patient after resting for only half an hour can return back home. Vasectomy is generally performed by giving local anesthesia to the patient concerned. Vasectomy side effects though are common but are rare and can be appropriately diagnosed. Vasectomy leads to certain side effects. Pain is a very common vasectomy side effect. The pain which is associated with vasectomy practically declines after a week. Swelling of the testicle areas which occur after a week of vasectomy is another vasectomy side effect. Abscesses are yet another vasectomy side effect which leads to infection but can be virtually treated with antibiotics. Erectile Dysfunction (ED) is also a vasectomy side effect. Erectile Dysfunction (ED) leads to the declination of sexual contentment and satisfaction but it is only very much temporary. Though the symptoms of vasectomy are rare it needs quick medical recommendations. Vasectomy side effects are thus very common but can be revealed and overcome with proper diagnosis. There are certain complications which are quite major in its aspects and often lead to certain infections. Staining, bruising, swelling and a certain amount of redness are quite common. It is however necessary to be estimated here that though the symptoms might be minor, it requires relevant medical advice. pnis enlargement cream penile enlargement traction device top rated penis enhancement pills pnis enlargement herb truth about penis enlarement pills vimax do penis enlargement pills really work pennis enlargement surgery photo penis enlargment surgeries vimax natural penis enlargement pills

The next problem is that most small online business owners usually have little money and not a lot of time to generate traffic and visitors to their site.... Many of them spend 6-8 hours every day just trying to generate some traffic to their site, product or service. And, at the end of each month, because nothing they seem to try ever works very well, they find themselves no better off than they were the month before. It doesn't take them long to realize what a big waste of time doing it that way really is. What we want to share with you today is one of the 'smartest' ways to generate an unlimited number of visitors to almost any site. It doesn't matter whether you are promoting a product, a service, a business opportunity or a content site. It doesn't matter how much your product costs ... It doesn't even matter if you are promoting your own products or someone elses via an affiliate program. If you want to promote ... need extra traffic or visitors ... want to increase your sales and monthly income, while automating 98% of it all - then keep reading. And while we can't cover ALL the different methods here, we would like to reveal 3 or 4 that we have found to be extremely inexpensive, relatively untapped, that have huge potential in bringing qualified traffic to your website. And, even more importantly ... regardless of whether you want 10,000 or 1,000,000 visitors, they only take about 30 minutes to set in motion! Why would you pay a lead-generation company $3 to $5 or more PER lead when you can generate your own at a fraction of the cost? So now instead of spending your entire day and your entire bank account trying to generate traffic to your site, what we are about to reveal should have you spending your time on more important things - like developing new products, growing your business, golfing, or whatever else it is that you really want to do. Isn't that the whole point of having your own web business ... so you can have more time and freedom to enjoy life and do as you wish? Wouldn't you agree, it's much better to spend 30 minutes or less on promotions, and to have the entire process automated? That's the difference between working SMART, and working HARD! You don't want to work HARD do you? The first thing we need you to know is that all website traffic is not created equal. There are plenty of sources out there and we can't speak for them all. However, we do use the traffic methods we mention below to successfully generate traffic and qualified leads to our business. And, as well as ones not mentioned below, they continue to work successfully to promote these types of online businesses with consistant success: Business Opportunities Network Marketing/MLM Franchise Opportunties Work-at-home programs Credit Cards/Repair Personal Finance Insurance offers Investment sites Computers, Software, etc Education, Jobs/Career "Free Stuff", Coupons, etc Internet/Web Services Shopping, Gifts, etc Sports/Sporting Goods Travel, Cars, Outdoors Pets, Hobbies, etc Mens/Womens Health Dieting, Fitness, etc Cooking, Gardening, etc Home Improvement Online Casinos sites Joke and Humor sites Online Games, Chat, etc Music, Sports, Movies, etc Pets, Hobbies, etc The traffic generation methods we are talking about are Pop-Ups, Pop-Unders, Keyword Targeted Pop-Unders, Expired Domain Traffic, AUDIO is OK traffic, and the different targeting platforms that can make them even more effective in promoting your business. It is important to note that these traffic generation methods are NOT spam advertising. All websites these methods take place with, have opted in to allow this to happen, are payed well to do so, and, there are tens of thousands of them participating). Let's start by taking a quick look at POP-UPS. I'm positive you've experienced "Pop-Ups" while surfing online. Pop-Ups are the irritating windows that suddenly "pop" out of nowhere, in front of what you were reading, interrupting what you are doing. We aren't going to spend a lot of time talking about Pop-Ups. They tend to get a lot of bad press; most people have software installed and most ISPs have blocking devices in place to eliminate them these day, which makes them not as popular a means of generating traffic. Nevertheless, because they are usually slightly cheaper than the other methods, some people still buy them in large quantities and use them to pull a small, but converting quantity of traffic to their websites. We want to spend more time talking about the other 3 types of promotion methods today. , and we will go next to the traffic method called Pop-Unders. POP-UNDERS - are pretty much what the name sounds like. The big difference between them and Pop-UPs is that Pop-Unders load **under** the current browser window. Because of that, they tend to not be as bothersome or interrupting to the web surfers as Pop-Ups. 99% of the time the web surfer doesn't even know the Pop-Under site is there until they move or close their main window, so they aren't in a "bad mood", from being interrupted, when they do see it. When you advertise your site with "Pop-Unders", your site is loaded behind another website that someone has just arrived at or left. Once the person closes off that particular site they then see yours, hence the name "pop-under". This is obviously a very cost effective way to have your site seen by thousands or even millions of people. Obviously this type of advertising, as with most others has its pros and cons. The pro being people WILL see your site by the thousands and the cost is extremely low. The con being most people will close the pop-under without bothering to browse your website. That is a fact you have to be aware of. You are NOT going to see conversion rates of 10% or anything like that ... far from it. However, you can make a small fortune even with a horrible conversion ratio. This form of traffic generation is so cost-effective that even if you only get 1 sale out of every 10,000 Pop-Unders you're still a head of the game! Let me say this another way, because this is the key and you really need to understand this. Quite truthfully, from a response ratio standpoint, Pop-Unders aren't choice #1, however, because they are so inexpensive, they can be one of the BEST ways to promote your site from an ROI (return on investment) standpoint, and that's what matters! Pop-Unders are quite a popular means of generating traffic, especially since they can be targeted by topic into almost any specific niche your website fits into. For example, if you have a sports website, it can be targeted to "appear" behind sports websites. Or, if you have a casino site, it can be targeted to load behind casino websites. It's obvious that only the visitors who are actually interested in those topics, would be looking at that niche site in the first place, right? Here are some of the many categories that can be targeted: Advertising Media - Agriculture - Animals - Antiques - Arts - Associations - Astronomy - Auctions - Auto Rental - Autos - Babies - Bathroom - Beauty - Bicycles - Boats - Books - Bridal - Building - Business - Camping - Candles - Candy & Confectionery - Cellular Phones - Cellular Service - Career Counselling - Car Audio - Charity - Chatrooms - Christian - Cigarettes - Cigars - Childrens Products - Clip art - Clocks & Watches - Clothes - Collectibles - College - College Nightlife - College Students - Comics - Computer Advice - Computer Memory - Computer Peripherals - Computer Programming - Computer Related - Computer Software - Computer Virus - Consumer Electronics - Conventions - Cooking - Cosmetics & Perfume - Costumes & Uniforms - Crafts & Craft Making - Credit Cards - Dance - Debt Consolidation - Diet - Domain Names - Education - Employment - Entertainment - Exhibitions & Conventions - Eye Care - Fabrics - Family - Farming - Fashion - Fashion for Men - Fashion for Women - Finance - Fishing - Fitness - Flights - Flooring - Flowers - Food & Beverage - Free Stuff - Friends & People - Furniture - Games - Games for Consoles - Games for PC - Gardening - Genealogy - Geography - Gifts - Golf - Government - Hair - Handbags - Health - Health for Men - Health for Women - High Tech - Home Business - Home Electronics - Horoscopes & Astrology - Horses - Hotels - Humour & Fun - Income Opportunities - Industry - Information - Insurance & Banking - Internet Services - Investment - Jewellery - Jobs & Career Counselling - Kids Activities - Kitchen - Language - Law & Law Enforcement - Liquor & Alcohol - Loans - Magazines - Maps - Marketing for Internet - Marketing non-Internet - Media - Miscellaneous - MLM - Money Making - Mortgages - Motorcycles - Movies & Films - Music/MP3 - Musical Instruments - Nature & Animals - News - Office Supplies - Organizations - Personal Advice - Personal Computers - Personal Homepage - Pest Control - Pets - Photography - Posters - Printers & Supplies - Property (Commercial) - Property (Residential) - Real Estate - Religion - Safety & Security - Sales - Science - Seniors & Retirement - Services - Shoes & Foot Products - Shopping - Skateboards - Smoking & Tobacco Products - Software - Sports - Tax - Tea & Coffee - Telephones & Service - Television & Satellite TV - Tickets - Top Web Sites - Toys - Training - Transportation - Travel & Tourism - Trivia - Vitamins - Web Design - Web Hosting - Web Resources - Webmasters -Wedding/Marriage - Adult Casino - Adult Movies - Adult Toys - Gay - Live Webcams - Match Making/Dating - Paysites - Paysites Amateurs - Paysites Hardcore - Paysites Interracial - Paysites Softcore - Paysites Teens - Penis Enlargement - Shopping - TGP - Untargeted Adult - Webmasters - Adult Casino - Free Games - Horse & Dog Racing - Premium Casino - Sports Betting - Untargeted Gambling. There are some limitations to using POP-traffic that you should be aware of. You will find that most traffic resellers state these limitations in their Terms and Conditions; in clear view on their websites: No other window of any type can be spawned internal or external of the target URL. The sites you submit may not contain any pop window (i.e exit pages, java pops, pop-ins, fly-ins, pop-unders, etc.). No redirectors, scripts that change the home page settings, message boxes, download boxes, are NOT allowed no hate/illegal/adult--All PG rated content. No warez, virus, trojan, auto-downloads, framebreakers, or browser-altering allowed. NO SOUND/NOISE on the page you are targeting. Before they start a campaign for you, they thoroughly check to see if any of these "traps" are on the site, and they do refuse service to any sites they determine are inappropriate for their network. Now while banning the presence of most of these "traps" listed above are valid, the NO sound/noise and the NO pop-up/under limitations that most traffic resellers enforce do stop A LOT of website businesses from using POP-traffic. Now there's a solution. AUDIO is OKAY! is a **new** mainstream form of traffic that ALLOWS you to have audio/sound and/or 1 Pop-Up or Pop-Under on your website's front page. What this means is that a lot of website businesses that have state-of-the-art movies, talking, or music presentations that start automatically on their front webpages, can now buy and use POP-traffic to generate visitors! This is new and this is in demand! Website promotion specialists can use POP-traffic to expose your business to millions of users with the most cost effective packages. They can deliver guaranteed visitors directly to your website 24/7. Whether you are looking to establish a presence on the Internet, or are just interested in branding your site, they can be your very own online advertising solution. best penis enlargment surgery permanent penis enlarement homemade penis enlagement penile enlargement operation penile enlargement testimonials penis enargement surgery picture natural penis enlagement natural pennis enlargement technique vimax natural penis enlargement pills

If you have taught your child all the rules of ‘stranger danger’ you have protected him/her from a 1% chance of being sexually abused. This leaves your child vulnerable to the most likely sexual child abuse offender, family members or other trusted adults. 80% of children are sexually abused by a family member, 19% are abused by someone the child knows and trusts. The other little known statistic is the frequency of sexual child abuse. David Finkelhor and Dianna Russell’s research reveals 62% of girls and 31% of boys will be sexually abused by age 18. Unfortunately this statistic is considered low due to the difficulty in gathering data through surveys or reporting agencies. For many decades we have screamed, ranted, condemned, demanded and enacted legislation to punish sex offenders to little avail. The news media and magazines have joined in the campaign to illuminate the problem after the damage is done. As a result of the media’s incessant coverage and hype of ‘strangers,’ we have come to believe if we teach our children about ‘stranger danger,’ we have thoroughly protected our children from this horrific crime. The first response we form when hearing of sexual abuse or incest is denial. ‘I don’t have to be concerned about that in my community. That would never happen in my family.’ The unbelievable reality is that a person who sexually abuses children may seem very average and ordinary to the world. Furthermore, we find sexual abuse and incest even more difficult to believe or accept when the person we like, admire, love, and/or marry is the perpetrator of the abuse. Tragically, the unwillingness to accept the facts concerning sexual abuse perpetrators leaves children vulnerable to becoming victims and increases the likelihood that they will be abused. To understand how sexual child abuse is perpetrated by the person we least suspect one needs to have a comprehensive definition of sexual abuse. “Traditionally, incest [sexual abuse] was defined as: sexual intercourse between two persons too closely related to marry legally--sex between siblings, first cousins, the seduction by fathers of their daughters. This dysfunctional blood relationship, however, does not completely describe what children are experiencing. To fully understand all sexual abuse, we need to look beyond the blood bond and include the emotional bond between the victim and his or her perpetrator. Thus, a new definition has emerged. The new definition now relies less on the blood bond between the victim and the perpetrator and more on the experience of the child. Incest is both sexual abuse and an abuse of power. It is violence that does not require force. Another is using the victim, treating them in a way that they do not want or in a way that is not appropriate by a person with whom a different relationship is required. It is abuse because it does not take into consideration the needs or wishes of the child; rather, it meets the needs of the other person at the child’s expense. If the experience has sexual meaning for another person, in lieu of a nurturing purpose for the benefit of the child, it is abuse. If it is unwanted or inappropriate for her age or the relationship, it is abuse. Incest [sexual abuse] can occur through words, sounds, or even exposure of the child to sights or acts that are sexual but do not involve her. If she is forced to see what she does not want to see, for instance, by an exhibitionist, it is abuse. If a child is forced into an experience that is sexual in content or overtone that is abuse. As long as the child is induced into sexual activity with someone who is in a position of greater power, whether that power is derived through the perpetrator’s age, size, status, or relationship, the act is abusive. A child who cannot refuse, or who believes she or he cannot refuse, is a child who has been violated.. (E. Sue Blume, Secret Survivors).” There are two types of sexual abuse approaches—overt and covert. Overt sexual abuse is openly sexual and apparent. Although there may be an attempt to deny that it is abusive, there is no attempt to hide the fact that it is sexual in nature. Covert sexual abuse is more insidious. Thus, identifying it is harder, because the sexual nature of the action is disguised. The perpetrator acts as if she/he is doing something non-sexual, when in fact he or she is being sexual. The betrayal then becomes two-fold. The child is not only abused, but also tricked or deceived about the act. In this dishonesty, the child is unable to identify or clarify his/her perception of the experience. The unreal or surreal sense that accompanies any sexual abuse is intensified when the child is tricked into disbelief. Thus, the child doubts his/her perceptions and feelings and believes that there is something wrong with him/herself because he/she feels terrible. To make matters worse, everyone around her/him discounts signs of the abuse, because we don’t want to believe someone with a sterling public image would do such a thing. Thus the child feels crazy, as if she/he is the one with the problem. One example of overt sexual abuse whereby the perpetrator disguises his actions and those present are in denial about what is transpiring is exemplified by the incident a client, who is a sexual abuse survivor, reported seeing. Her father (her perpetrator) kissed his granddaughter, her one-year-old niece on the pubic area after her niece finished her bath. Her sister, the child’s mother, the child’s grandmother (wife of the perpetrator) were present. “My sister and mother (the child’s grandmother) laughed and I got sick to the stomach. Am I over reacting,” she asked. Obviously, her sister and mother are unaware of the definition of sexual abuse. Except for the fact this woman was in therapy she would not have considered it sexual abuse either. An example of covert sexual abuse by someone we least expect is exemplified by a 39 year-old woman who came to me after having a severe panic attack. During our investigation as to the root cause of the panic attack she revealed she had been ‘fondled’ when she was nine by a family friend. “He helped me on with my coat at a family gathering. As he adjusted my coat onto my shoulder, he fondled my breast.” This type fondling is often times referred to as ‘coping a feel.’ No matter the label, it is sexual abuse and causes damage. Women know how icky it feels when a man ‘cops a feel.’ Can you imagine what it would feel like for a nine-year-old, who has no information to comprehend and emotionally resolve what she experienced? Another example of covert sexual abuse by someone you least expect was told to me by my client, Rickie (not his real name). He remembered being held by his mother’s best friend in the water at the beach when he was six, while his parents sat on the beach. Fully protected from view by the water, she fondled his penis. This was not the end of the sexual abuse. When Rickie was 15 years old, she enticed him to have sex with her at her home while he waited for her son, his friend to come home. The second incident of her sexual abuse of Rickie was overt. There are six key techniques to abuse-proof your child. •Avoid spanking your child—spanking is a body boundary violation. Perpetrators target children who have had body boundary violations because they are less apt to protest any unacceptable body boundary violations, are more compliant with adults and are less apt to tell. You can avoid your child from falling prey to these cunning perpetrators by doing everything to avoid making your child a target. •Avoid touching your child in erotic areas—buttocks, chest, thighs, etc. Perpetrators state they use familiar touch (rubbing the child’s legs, buttocks or hugging/kissing) to desensitize the child before using touch which is sexual in content and intent. If your child is unaccustomed to being touched in erotic areas, he/she will protest immediately. Protesting will either thwart the perpetrator or alert anyone nearby that something is awry. •Teach your child self-protection by teaching him/her to protest violation of body boundaries or unwanted touch beginning at age two. •Practice and teach your child good body image. •Practice and teach your child to TELL YOU EVERYTHING, NO SECRETS FROM MOMMY and DADDY. •Practice and Teach Appropriate Suspicion—Trust your intuition, (a.k.a Sixth Sense)